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Saturday, 2 October 2010

On Style: Teeth...

Your smile is often the first thing someone will notice about you when you meet. Nothing can be more damaging to first impressions or personally inhibitive than the self-consciousness rooted in the appearance of your teeth. Closed-mouth communication does not work. Attempting to hide your mossy molars will not do you any favours in the long run. So if you have problems with your teeth, you need to fix them now.

Firstly, are they straight enough? You don’t need picket-fence pre-molars to get away with this, so don’t spend thousands on corrective surgery to give you a Tom Cruise-esque grin, but horribly wonky teeth or uneven gaps can be sorted out by a brace. If you need one, get one – don’t be put off by committing yourself to train tracks for a year or two – it beats never being comfortable with your smile for the rest of your life.

I have one problem tooth and have never had braces because it sits on the bottom row and is almost totally unnoticeable. It is, as well, characterful so I let it be. I won’t deny, though, it does irk me something rotten and I wish I could have had it sorted at a younger age when it was cheaper to get it put right.

I’ve dealt with this ‘snaggletooth’ by creating a personality for it: it’s my ‘meat tooth’ – unrivalled in the tearing of steak and mastication of gristle. It has been the source of much self effacing humour and exists in harmony with the rest of my pearly whites.

Which leads me nicely on to the next point – whiteness. Your teeth should be whitish. Not literally white, but a healthy shade of beige that is indicative of good dental hygiene and strong enamel.

More important than the shade of your teeth (as everyone’s are slightly different), is their uniformity. Blemishes and rotten spots look awful and if you are afflicted by such stubborn stains, a one-off whitening treatment might be the best bet.

Don’t go overboard though – frequent exposure to chemicals can strip the enamel from your teeth, and although they might look whiter than ever, they will degrade at a faster rate than is manageable.

For a gentler approach, try a strong smoker’s toothpaste or a home whitening kit that takes longer to work and can be controlled responsibly.

We all remember the episode of Friends when Ross bleached his teeth to the point at which they glowed in the dark. This is not cool. What you want to achieve is a happy medium: clean, uniformly off-white teeth that point in the same direction as the ones they sit between.

O, and remember to brush twice a day. Strong toothpaste and mouthwash should do the trick.


Pick up THE HARE newspaper at Night and Day, Bar Centro, Font or Tiger Lounge in Manchester town centre, or the Oakwood in Glossop.

E-mail theharenewspaper@hotmail.co.uk with questions, comments or contributory pieces.

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