Firstly, I'd like to add so that I don't offend anyone special to me, that these rules did not spring forth from my brain, but that of another, much sicker, more tactically astute, ballsier man.
He is a fan of these rules and, hypothetically, I can't help but see where he's coming from...
RULE 1: It is important to have a woman who helps at home, cooks, cleans and has a job.
RULE 2: It is important to have a woman who can make you laugh.
RULE 3: It is important to have a woman you can trust and who would never lie to you.
RULE 4: It is important to have a woman who is good in bed and likes being with you.
RULE 5: It is absolutely fucking vital that these four women don't know each other.
Pick up THE HARE newspaper at Night and Day, Bar Centro, Font or Tiger Lounge in Manchester town centre, or the Oakwood in Glossop.
E-mail theharenewspaper@hotmail.co.uk with questions, comments or contributory pieces.
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