Group A: Uruguay 1st, Mexico 2nd The French, who wound up finishing bottom of this group with one point and one goal to their name, entered this World Cup amidst the controversy of Henry’s double hand-ball that sent the spirited and, in terms of fair-play and pluck, more deserving Republic of Ireland home. Les Bleus put in an absolutely woeful showing and thoroughly disgraced a nation that has, over the past twelve years, been one of the undisputed elite on the world stage. There was infighting, training-ground strikes and fall-outs that would have been more at home in Hollyoaks than South Africa. Domenech must be on his way out (ironically, one win short of being the most successful French coach ever – who says statistics don’t lie?). The players must regroup and unfortunately for Patrice Evra, Man United’s world class left back, his captaincy may be over almost as soon and suddenly as it began. But on to those who did turn up to play the greatest tournament in the world: Uruguay were, without doubt, worthy winners. Forlan and Suarez are as good as billed and they, along with the athletic and inventive Mexican frontline that includes Arsenal’s Vela and United’s Hernandez, have a decent shot of making a deep run in this tournament now that England’s migration to the other side of the draw has left the Uruguayans with a manageable next-round clash with S. Korea to set-up a quarter final date with either the USA or Ghana. Uruguay for their third championship? With only Holland or Brazil in the way of the final, who knows?
Group B: Argentina 1st, South Korea 2nd Diego Maradona has the easiest job in the world. He doesn’t so much pick this team of pass-happy tackle merchants, as stand on the touchline trying to work out how much cocaine he can buy with a salary that reflects his legendary status, not the amount of effort he puts in to choosing which world-class midfield to play around Lionel Messi (whose place in the side has been rightly solidified with the captain’s armband and three orchestral performances from the centre of the park). The Argentineans move on with 9 points, and despite a master class in wasteful finishing against the Nigerians and a nervy, physical 2-0 win over Greece, have done well not to bottle it in the wake of such expectation. Like England this team is immensely talented on paper, but a rocky qualifying campaign and unrest with Maradona’s coaching style looked to undermine chances of the new golden generation of Argentines. South Korea are the right team to get out of this group with Messi and his men, but they will likely struggle to defend the powerful long-range shooting of Uruguay in the last 16. That said, should they beat the South Americans, they could well emulate the team of 2002 that made it to the Semis on home soil by beating either the USA or Ghana in the quarters. By the by: Greece finally scored a goal in the World Cup (two in fact, so old Otto should be proud)
Group C: USA 1st, England 2nd England made tough work of qualifying from a group that sounded easy but, as FIFA rankings and events proved, was as tricky to navigate as a potholed road in the dark. The USA ended up winning by virtue of more goals scored (their 2-2 draw with Slovenia trumps England’s 0-0 with Algeria), and despite not being value for the draw against Capello’s men, played with enough energy and with the absence of luck (in the second two games, at least, having 2 perfectly good goals disallowed) to deserve top-spot. England looked sharp against Slovenia and should really have won 4-0, but their failure to find the net consistently has set-up a last 16 clash with everyone’s second favourite team, Germany. The Germans got out of the blocks fast, but have shown themselves to be beatable and less remarkable than first thought. Their initial advantage with the Jabulani ball is dwindling as teams get used to its flight, so England could, if they play like they did against Slovenia, waltz into a nightmare Quarter-final against Argentina, and waiting for them after that is a potential Semi-final clash with European Champions Spain. Whichever way you look at it England have made lifting the World Cup for the second time a difficult task. Most surprisingly though, their opponents could feasibly be the team they failed to put to bed in the very first game. The USA have a stupidly easy route to the Semis where they may meet Brazil or Holland. It’s just one game – who knows what might happen? We could be playing our cousins from across the Atlantic in the greatest game on Earth for the greatest prize. Group C could provide both finalists, but for that to happen Wayne Rooney needs to get his scoring boots on and Capello needs to put his faith in the young guns who fired us into the last sixteen. My team of choice? James, A. Cole, Terry, Upson, Johnson, J. Cole, Barry, Gerrard, Milner, Rooney, Defoe. Leave Fat Frank on the bench until he sorts himself out.
Group D: Germany 1st, Ghana 2nd The mighty Serbs fell at the first hurdle, despite beating a ten-man Germany 1-0. An unfortunate loss to Australia in the final group game sees them on the plane home and marks the end of their attempt to become the latest nation to lift the trophy for the first time. At the start of the tournament Serbia, ranked 13th in the world, were 70-1 outsiders. I know people who bet on them and their solid, uncompromising display against Germany was enough to justify the faith of those who backed them to win it all. Ghana sneaked through after an uninspiring three games that included a shoddy draw with Australia, a deserved loss to Germany and a fortunate penalty-derived victory against the aforementioned Serbs. Australia were, in the end, unlucky to have lost so heavily to Germany in their opener. Had the deficit been less they might have found themselves through in Ghana’s place, but the Germans capitalised on their familiarity with the new ball that befuddled so many during the low-scoring first week of the competition. And so the Socceroos go home with four points and no disgrace. The Serbians again falter after a majestic qualifying campaign. The Germans march on to face England in the last 16, knowing that victory against their old rivals would set-up a Quarter-final meeting with the team they shared trophies with in 1986 and 1990. Things are getting serious.
Group E: Holland 1st, Japan 2nd On the back of some truly wretched form, the Japanese entered this year’s World Cup with low expectations. A nervy 1-0 win over Cameroon, a damage-limiting 1-0 defeat to Holland and a feisty win over the fancied Danes later, and they find themselves in the last 16 and facing a showdown with Paraguay for the right to progress further. The Dutch won 3 of 3 and although not demolishing opponents as their incoming form might have suggested they would, they have been solid and kept, quite surprisingly, three clean sheets in a row. They are the only team in the World Cup which has taken 9 points and avoided conceding in open play (their one slip-up was a penalty from Samuel Eto’o for a Rafael van der Vaart handball) – an impressive record (Uruguay are yet to concede, and Argentina have taken 9 points). Denmark should be disappointed with their performance: for long periods of the opening game against the Dutch they looked slick and competent. A come-from-behind win over Cameroon showed character and flashes of offensive power. But a flaccid display against the hapless Japs sees them travelling home early, and rueing the fact that qualification would have set-up a string of winnable games.
Group F: Paraguay 1st, Slovakia 2ndNewsflash: the Italians are down and out – so down they finished below New Zealand in their group. Having amassed a pathetic 2 points from 3 games, Lippi’s perennially feared team crashed out of the competition they won four years ago. To make matters worse, they lost-out on a place in the last sixteen having found themselves drawn in what must definitely be seen as the weakest group of the tournament. They should have walked it, but, in their place, Paraguay and Slovakia, of all nations, will be represented in the last 16. Paraguay face the salivating prospect of playing Japan, whereas Slovakia must turn up to lose to Holland. In fairness, Paraguay are a decent side and the Slovaks put 3 past Italy to ensure that, for the first time in living memory, neither of the previous Cup’s finalists made it out of the group stage. So two great nations have fallen in the group: will one of their replacements in the last 16 go on to win the World Cup and install a new world order? The Azzurri will have to watch it on TV if they do…
Group G: Brazil 1st, Portugal 2nd Seven goals; Ronaldo on the score-sheet; three clean-sheets; a sexy new Nike kit and a coach who is completely likable: Portugal have arrived. Gone is the golden generation of Figo, Rui Costa and Pauletta. This is the time of Ronaldo, a totally mature Deco, an in-form Raul Meireles and the commanding experience of Carvalho. Sure, they wound up second to Brazil by virtue of not beating a physical, but on the whole, disappointing Ivory Coast side, but their demolition of North Korea was exactly what the contest had been lacking – a bit of balls, and not just the ones that wound-up in the back of the net. Brazil themselves are solid but unconvincing group winners and head into the last sixteen eyeing-up a dangerous encounter with Chile. Portugal must beat Group G winners Spain, who have been impressive in patches. If they overcome the world number ones they will face either Paraguay or Japan – a fortunate road to the Semi finals where they will probably find England, Argentina or Germany waiting for them. Of the three they probably fancy England who harbour a distinct bête noir for their Iberian friends. Assuming Brazil make it to the Quarters, they will have to beat the as yet unblemished Dutch – a game that should bring fireworks unless the Orangemen hit the self-destruct button as they so often do at this stage of proceedings. It was unfortunate to lose the Ivoirians so soon in the competition, but their chances of traversing the Group of Death were always going to be slim with their talismanic forward, Didier Drogba of Chelsea, playing with a slightly broken arm. On a sad note, the North Koreans are likely to be liquefied on return to their secretive homeland, and recast into one giant super-player in the form of Kim Jong Il, who will single-handedly demolish all other teams at the 2014 World Cup in Brazil before declaring himself vice-president of the world and aiding his bespectacled father’s ascension to the throne.
Group H: Spain 1st, Chile 2nd Group H started with a bang when the un-fancied Swiss dealt Spain a crushing defeat. The Spanish recovered against a canny Honduran side by winning 2-0. That score line proved decisive as the Swiss, who lost 1-0 to Chile, played-out a turgid 1-0 victory over Honduras and, by virtue of Chile’s goal difference, found themselves on the outside looking in, in spite of beating the world’s top-ranked team. Spain are the best unit in the world. Without question their players are world class and their management has been cool and their passage to these finals unflustered. In David Villa they possess a striker who is always potent. As it stands he is a candidate for the golden boot should Spain progress further, which they will if they can beat a confident Portugal: no amount of coaching can instil the same kind of self-belief as a rout, which, thanks to North Korea, they were handed. The Spanish should steel themselves for their first real test – if they play with as little inspiration as they did against Switzerland they will have to notch 2010 up as another year expectations failed to be met. As for the Chileans, they have to contend with a fancied Brazil side. It is totally possible that the Quarter-finals will boast no representative from Group H, which would, of course, be a shock given Spain’s supremacy in qualifying and their worldwide dominance since their glorious victory in Euro 2008 courtesy of Fernando Torres’ clinical strike in the final against the Germans. If Spain beat Portugal the road to the final will not be any easier save for being one game shorter. England, Argentina or Germany (or possibly Mexico – who knows?) await in a titanic Semi.
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